Is anyone else sick of these jacklegs excessively honking their horns on our otherwise peaceful residential streets? Ok, so I admit this is a 'first world problem', but I'm tired of this busch league driving.
There's the "21-honk salute" - tapping the horn several times, often for the entire length of a block. I've also witnessed "the deadarm" - laying on the horn to show impatience with a minor traffic jam ahead (often caused by a Subaru executing a poor parallel parking job). Then there's the one that boils my blood like no other - the "Ima let you know that the light is turning green by honking at you from behind as it changes". It is because of the last one that I am thankful to have a sunroof in my vehicle, freely allowing me to float and hold the middle finger back at the buffoon behind me to let him know I received his astute message.
Tonight, on my stroll from the 7th Ave. F train station to my PS abode, I witnessed a 21-honk salute about a half a block up coming toward me. The driver was honking and honking at another car that was double parked for a spot a good 50 feet ahead of him (and no obstruction to his passage at all). I just so happened to be striding into the crosswalk as he passed by, so of course I yelled "Stop honking!" at him. The driver then stopped immediately, threw his car into reverse (I was standing directly behind him), didn't actually move in reverse, but leaned out and started shouting obscenities at me. I then did what any peaceful, loving resident of PS would do...I kicked his rear bumper pretty damn hard. This set off the jackleg.
Sidebar: I don't condone my own action of kicking the car's bumper here. It was a visceral reaction to a perceived threat i.e. getting run over if he'd let off the brake and getting just about every hateful word thrown at me. Do I regret it? No. But I certainly don't recommend it. I'm a big dude, at 6'4" and 215, but still...you never know what these a-holes have with them in their cars.
He then proceeded to follow me about a half block down 8th Ave., continuing to hurl obscenities at me. I stopped twice and calmly asked him to get out of his car to politely discuss the issue with me...
but he apparently preferred to stay in the comfort and safety of his shitty, rundown Towncar. Eventually, he sped off.
I share this little story out of frustration. I can dodge the double-wide strollers, super weird stoop sales of useless garbage, and cyclists who feel like they own the road, but I can't stand drivers who unnecessarily lay on their horns.
My idea: the loudness of a vehicle's horn should be directly related to the speed at which the vehicle is traveling.
Apologies to livery cab drivers if I am unfairly targeting you with my rage. It's just that most of the offenses that I've witnessed have been from shitty, beat-up Lincoln Towncars speeding down residential streets.
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