important cat advice needed

Unknown

So last fall i adopted the most magical adult cat in the world. She and I get along like two peas in a pod. I felt bad she spent so much time alone so I got her a kitten. At first the older cat *hated* the kitten. Now they sort of romp around and groom eachother, etc.

The kitten is now 8 months old. He is eternally skiddish, fearful of people, and has weird bathroom behavior. ie he doesn't cover his poop and when he gets mad he poops somewhere he shouldn't ie my toilet seat! He is also very destructive in my mind (unravels toilet paper, etc.) I feel horrible about the thoughts that are crossing my mind (separating them...). I am moving to a cat-friendly home in August but wonder if it is everyone's best interest to return him to the organization I adopted him from (part of the agreement was not to adopt him out if things didn't work out...) in part because I fear he will be destructive of the property of the folks I am moving in with.

I am really torn up about this. My friends think the responsible thing to do is give him back so they can find him a home with someone who can manage him better (???) but my mother thinks of him as one of my children (and so do I to some extent!) and that I should just brave through his kitten time (4 more months?) and hope for the best.

Is it more traumatizing to separate a bonded pair? They are from different litters and have been living together 8 months.

Please, any and all advice needed. I want to be responsible and I want to give each cat a positive loving environment and I need to know if that means keeping them together or separating them.

Thank you.