I'm working my 2 weeks notice at work

carmen

Subject: I'm working my 2 weeks notice at work

and clearly my level of motivation is at an all-time high.
Someone entertain me with something hilarious that doesn't involve flash or sound.


annnd go

alafairnadia

catch up with gawker and curbed. that's always time consuming and entertaining.

carnivore

Overheard In New York

opossumqueen

I was just reading Overheard in NY after seeing this thread...there's some priceless stuff there.

From Overheard in NY:
Guy: Bitch, I bet you couldn't even spell 'rhetorical.'
Girl: Yes I can! R-H-E-T-O-R-I-C-L-E.
Guy: Are... Are you serious?
Girl: Yeah! Who's the dumbass now?!

livetotravel

are you a tennis fan?

MOD

This one was funny as hell:

I Meant Nowhere White People Would Want to Go

Blond Tourist Bimbo: I've never even heard of the G Train.
Blond Local Bimbo: Yeah, it's a ghetto train.
Blond Tourist Bimbo: Where does it go?
Blond Local Bimbo: Nowhere.
Black eight-year-old boy: Except my home, bitch.

--G train Hoyt/Schermerhorn station

MOD

Ha! This one too:

Tourist man: Pardon me, officer, can you tell us where Orchard Street is?
Cop: See that naked Chinese guy?
Tourist man: Ummm...Yeah.
Cop: Walk down to him and make a left.
Tourist man: Um, thanks.
Cop: No problem.

--Delancey & Allen

Get in Line, Buddy

Girl on cell: You don't play with my tits enough! You just go right to it, and avoid the girls! I need some titty action!
Suit on cell, listening: I gotta go, I have to try to pick this girl up. I've never had a better come-on line in my life!

--Duane Reade, Columbus Ave

Overheard by: VERONICA

carmen

Keep em comin folks. I've got 9 days left haha

sprite

Overheard in New York is great! Love this one:

Passionate man: You have to be able to voice your own opinion! Stand up for yourself! You're the CFO of a four billion dollar company -- you have to be able to make these kinds of decisions!

Lady with him, totally baffled: I was just so overwhelmed -- I've never seen so many different kinds of rice pudding...!

--Outside Rice to Riches, Spring St