frightened to live on my own block
i am a 23 yrd old wf , i have lived on my block /of st johns near franklin for over a yr with no problems, everyone in the community was always really nice to me , and i've nice been to them . in the past few weeks things seem to have changed. last week while at the the deli on the corner i was robbed at the counter by a middle aged-black woman , who not only took my money out of my hand that i was paying for something with but took the change that the store owner had been handing me as well, and then proceeded to scratch me with her nails and scream at me ( telling me i didnt deserve the money cuz i was stupid white bitch, , etc , etc. amongst other degrading profanities ) . i was dead broke and paying in change, also trying to change some change into bills so i could get a metro card to go to school. i hadnt even spoken to her. the store owner told me to ignore her and that she was crazy, but after she stole my money and attacked me ( while i stood there crying), she asked for a pack of cigarettes , and paid with a 50, and he gave her back her change , no comments to her . there were about 10 people in the store and nobdy said anything. THEN LAST NITE , when i finally went back to this store , i was in line when an eldery ( about 60ish) black man came in and said hello to me, i said hello and smiled, he looked right at me and in a calm tone of voice , grabbed my arm and told me " listen you cracker slut i dont know where the fuck you came from but if you say one word to me i will fucking slit your throat, now you put down whatever you got and get you crackah ass out out off here and go back to wherever you came from and if i ever see your face around here againm i will fucking kill you where you stand!" then he shook me and shoved me out of the store. i was so overwhelmed i didnt even know what to do , i ran home and havent left house since. also at the time of this incident there were several people in the store and no one said or did anything . obviously there are mean people in the world and this sucks , ( and i'm not going back to this particular deli anymore) but why does it seem like a rash of cruelty in the neighborhood ? or was i just lucky before >?
Comments
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These incidents sound horrible. What did the police say?
I would not give that deli owner any more of my money after his reactions. It's unbelieveable...
I would also SCREAM and act generally crazy if this happened again, either incident. Or I'd like to think I would. There is a certain type of assertiveness, which I have when I'm feeling confident and don't when I'm distracted or feeling sad, which really helps not just keep the crazies away but also helps me deal with them. I'm NOT saying that what happened is your fault, and it happens to people (of all races) all the time, no matter what they do. But there must be things we can do - the least of which is carrying on, being brave. Does anyone have any suggestions?
I had a few incidents where people in the neighborhood were really cruel, and they used my looking white as an issue. Please don't let it hurt you so that you're frightened to live on your own block.
You were unlucky for a week after a year of being lucky. I'm so sorry. Have a good cry and then be brave and hold your head up and go out, go to someplace in the neighborhood you like. Do you have some friends who can come over and hang out with you, walk around with you? Do you know any of your neighbors who you could talk to, maybe for sympathy? Have some wine. Do something you like, watch TV or see a movie or read a book to escape. Take a brisk walk. Take care of yourself. Don't give up.
Please do let me know what the police said. -
sorry to hear this happen. wanna move to bensonhurst its as cheap but much safer for ya.
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Did you even bother to call the police? Im sure these people are locals. Point them out to the cops, so we can get these savages off the street. FIGHT OR FLIGHT!!!!!!
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i think violet gave some beautiful & heartfelt advice
and if you haven't, please, please call the precinct and report this
i can only say what my response would be, and that would be to dig in deeper, become more a part of the community. one way is to attend community meetings, the 2 most obvious would be the 77th precinct community council and the crow hill community association (more intimate)
and i would share my experience!
77th precinct community council
2nd monday of each month at 7:30
next meeting: 12/11
St Gregory the Great
980 St John's Place
CHCA
third tuesday of each month at 7:30
Tuesday 12/19, 7:30 PM
Haitian-American Daycare Center
1491 Bedford Ave., Bklyn, NY
(Cnr. of Bedford & St. John’s)
http://www.crowhillcommunity.org/ -
armchair_warrior wrote: sorry to hear this happen. wanna move to bensonhurst its as cheap but much safer for ya.
Safer for white people that is.
rt220, I'm terribly sorry this happened to you.
Definitely go to the police about this. A more assertive attitude and some pepper spray in the purse may help if you're physically assaulted like that again. -
X-brooklynite wrote: [quote=armchair_warrior]sorry to hear this happen. wanna move to bensonhurst its as cheap but much safer for ya.
Safer for white people that is.
rt220, I'm terribly sorry this happened to you. Definitely go to the police about this. A more assertive attitude and some pepper spray in the purse may help if you're physically assaulted like that again.
the area has change since the mid 90's white folks started to move out when asians started to move in. but alot stayed. now days asians,whites,Orthodox jews, russians, and south asians have move in. -
armchair_warrior wrote:
Black people moving to bensonhurst too????
the area has change since the mid 90's white folks started to move out when asians started to move in. but alot stayed. now days asians,whites,Orthodox jews, russians, and south asians have move in. -
Just don't frequent local businesses that treat you poorly. There are plenty of others who will welcome your business. Avoid nutjobs like these you describe - there are plenty of them in NYC. Leave them to stew in their own juices.
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X-brooklynite wrote: [quote=armchair_warrior]
Black people moving to bensonhurst too????
the area has change since the mid 90's white folks started to move out when asians started to move in. but alot stayed. now days asians,whites,Orthodox jews, russians, and south asians have move in.
yeah now days. in the past white folks in the area never rented out to minorities, but past few years people started to rent out to Hispanics and blacks. in the past people would look closely at none white people walking around. now days you have minorities walking around a lot.
. this part of the hood has change alot. it still alot safer and still very cheap and have tons of amenities -
I think y'all got played and this posting is a bunch of bullshit. Just my gut instinct.
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LeeHo wrote: I think y'all got played and this posting is a bunch of bullshit. Just my gut instinct.
Based on... ? :roll: -
Carnivore wrote: [quote=LeeHo]I think y'all got played and this posting is a bunch of bullshit. Just my gut instinct.
Based on... ? :roll:
Based on the fact there's only been one post and common sense (sorry to be crass) would have been to call the cops, if not the first time, then definitely the second.
My 2 cents is that LeeHo may be correct. If not, the poster has gotten pretty severe wake up call, but need to react. having lived through some racially "bad times" back in my old 'hood of Ft. Greene (many years ago), it was always watch your back...but, take no shit. It's YOUR nabe too, regardless if you are a newbie there or not.
My 2 cents...and second sense. -
I think you guys should hold off before rushing to judgment. There have been more than one time in the past that a new poster wrote about similar incidents then didn't come back to the boards for a few days, and then found it pretty hurtful to see accusations like this. Give her the benefit of the doubt -- she's young and it sounds like she was very frightened.
That said, I do hope rt220 comes back and fills us in more, and I *really* hope she called the police about these incidents. That does more good than just posting about it on a message board. -
It so interesting that so many posts like this devolve into calling the original poster a liar, or attacking them. I have also been on the wrong end of weird "you don't belong here" bullshit, NUMEROUS TIMES in CH, most recently from my actual landlady! Yeah, that's right! It's a very pathetic and small mindset that can't accept new people in the neighborhood, no matter how friendly or positive. She happily takes my rent money, though!
I wonder how people would react if white or hispanic people treated black people the same way nowadays? Is reverse racism ok? Why can't Americans get the hell over racism, especially in a cosmopolitan city like Brooklyn where people from almost every country are represented?
So... The original post sounds quite realistic to me. rt220 is only 23, and I can easily imagine not knowing how to react in a situation like that at 23. I live just a few blocks away {for the time being} from the "supposed" scene of rt220's experience. I would like to know, exactly which bodega did this happen in? And WHY on earth did you go back? -
guys come on, thats a bit harsh. don't beat up the victim here. give the person the benefit of the doubt here.
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sje wrote: I wonder how people would react if white or hispanic people treated black people the same way nowadays? Is reverse racism ok? Why can't Americans get the hell over racism, especially in a cosmopolitan city like Brooklyn where people from almost every country are represented?
It did happen to black people-more so in the 80's and prior to that when going into predominantly white neighborhoods--Mostly verbal abuse with having the n word used against you and being told to get out of the area. Plus those rare occurrences of whites ganging up on and beating a single black person, e.g., A black transit worker in gravesend in the early 80's not to mention other incidences.
Having said that, two wrongs definitely don't make a right.
It not surprising at all that it happened in brooklyn. While more gentrification has happened in the last 10 years or so, the provincial attitudes of neighborhood people in a formerly very balkanized borough still remain and die hard. -
X-brooklynite wrote: [quote=sje]I wonder how people would react if white or hispanic people treated black people the same way nowadays? Is reverse racism ok? Why can't Americans get the hell over racism, especially in a cosmopolitan city like Brooklyn where people from almost every country are represented?
It did happen to black people-more so in the 80's and prior to that when going into predominantly white neighborhoods--Mostly verbal abuse with having the n word used against you and being told to get out of the area. Plus those rare occurrences of whites ganging up on and beating a single black person, e.g., A black transit worker in gravesend in the early 80's not to mention other incidences.
Having said that, two wrongs definitely don't make a right.
It not surprising at all that it happened in brooklyn. While more gentrification has happened in the last 10 years or so, the provincial attitudes of neighborhood people in a formerly very balkanized borough still remain and die hard.
in the 1980's i got it from both ends. in black area's i got chase and beaten and in white areas same thing. but these days its rarely only racial slurs mostly from lower economic areas. -
sje wrote: I wonder how people would react if white or hispanic people treated black people the same way nowadays?
Um, they do. Ever been to Howard Beach? Pretty sure they are still lynching people of color out there. Midwood? Pakastani guy was just a victim of a hate crime out there. Its not like its a vestige of the past. People of color are still being targetted by racial profiling, including most recently by the NYPD at subway stops in October when the officers were specifically told to stop each and every black man going through the station (http://www.nyclu.org/nypd_racial_profiling_pr_101606.html)
Its just we don't hear much about it when someone of color is discriminated against. But as soon as a white person is made to feel uncomfortable in his/her environment its "reverse racism."
I have all the empathy in the world for the original poster, it sucks what happened. But to say "what if it happened to people of color nowadays" is just laughable. -
In my world, which consists almost solely of Brooklyn, I don't see much, if any, blatant racism, and if I did, I would be shocked. Granted, I don't hang in Howard Beach, or Midwood,Bay Ridge, etc... It all seems somewhat equal to me. People of all races come into my shop, separately and together. I'm talking about casual, everyday occurrances, not the rare, stupid JO who beats someone up/kills them. I'm sure it happens frequently , though, not arguing with you.
Racial profiling is pathetic, agreed. For me to be made to feel uncomfortable in my own neighborhood because of my skin is just as bad as "regular" racism, sorry. -
jayce wrote: [quote=sje]I wonder how people would react if white or hispanic people treated black people the same way nowadays?
Um, they do. Ever been to Howard Beach? Pretty sure they are still lynching people of color out there. Midwood? Pakastani guy was just a victim of a hate crime out there. Its not like its a vestige of the past. People of color are still being targetted by racial profiling, including most recently by the NYPD at subway stops in October when the officers were specifically told to stop each and every black man going through the station (http://www.nyclu.org/nypd_racial_profiling_pr_101606.html)
Its just we don't hear much about it when someone of color is discriminated against. But as soon as a white person is made to feel uncomfortable in his/her environment its "reverse racism."
I have all the empathy in the world for the original poster, it sucks what happened. But to say "what if it happened to people of color nowadays" is just laughable.
almost all races do it. just the media report some more than others. you'll rarely read about asians getting beaten in some areas or white guys getting beaten in some areas. its doesnt sells. -
rt220 - how are you doing? Are you feeling better? Have you been out? Which deli did this happen at? What did the police say? Do you think you'll be going to any of the meetings that neene suggests? I'm thinking about it...
sje - your landlady? Really?! That's ugly, but in a way that's so ridiculous that it's almost funny. I'm sorry. It is so wrong...
I think that people like to group other people, and think (and act) cruelly towards The Other. I had an epiphany when I found myself doing it to two very different groups of litterbugs within an hour, when I realized how easy it was and how it didn't matter who I was grouping so long as they were different from me. It is almost always very wrong, I think, but it's hard to resist doing. Especially when it's useful... I am doing much better since understanding how it happens in my mind. That has NOT made dealing with crazy or mean people (or litterbugs) easier. But it is right and it has made me deal with anger, even petty anger, more directly. I hope to get better... I'm trying to couple it with forgiveness. Boy, it's not easy! -
sorry , this post was not bs. i just have not been staying at home the past few days , therefore not been back online. to be honest , no i did not call cops , because i thought they would think i was making a big deal out of nothing, and bacuse i thought the store owner ( which was s&n deli on corner of franklin and st johns ) would probbably never say he saw anything , and i dont blame him, that would just cause him bigger problems. but after reading this i think i will call them ( the police ) just to file an incident report ... and the reason i went back to the deli the week after the first incident .... umm... i was too lazy too walk anywhere else in my pajamas and i wanted a coke to drink while i watched tv, and i thought that the previous incident had been a fluke , a once in a million thing and there was no way other people in this neighborhood , much less in the same store, or in the 100 yds between my house and the store would treat me that way again....honestly this whole incident has made me extremely uncomfortable being in the neighborhood, especially alone, and i have spent the weekend apartment hunting, oh well, i guess its time to sarcrifice eating for rent money just to feel safe again.
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rt220 wrote: i have spent the weekend apartment hunting, oh well, i guess its time to sarcrifice eating for rent money just to feel safe again.
Boerum Hill? Prospect Heights? Maybe a different borough-Queens-Astoria? LIC? -
no , actually. greenpoint/east williamsburg/bushwick
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also for those who were asking , i did call the cops tonite , i told them what happened and asked what the next step of action was , ( i.e. incident report etc.) was told , " well this is a rough neighborhood , be careful, if it happens again we'll send a squad car over, good luck " and that was that.......
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rt220 wrote: also for those who were asking , i did call the cops tonite , i told them what happened and asked what the next step of action was , ( i.e. incident report etc.) was told , " well this is a rough neighborhood , be careful, if it happens again we'll send a squad car over, good luck " and that was that.......
so no incident report at all? -
My thoughts--what happened to you, rt220, sucked absolutely royally. I am angry at the people involved. A few things I've noticed--I live around the corner from you--my feeling--those bodegas are all pretty sketchy. Also, after dark, the neighborhood is crawling with crackheads, and they behave exactly as you described--they're very angry and violent, and tend to grab money from whoever they can. As far as anger against whites, that's a reality, and I've argued with everybody on the board about it and gotten so fed up with trying to explain my POV, but based on my life of thirty nine years as a biracial African-American, my sense is that blacks and whites have very deep rooted problems with each other.
Of course that doesn't mean whites should flee the 'hood, but I would say the following things--
1. Have some black friends and be seen with them. If you live in a black neighborhood, it's not enough just to "be friendly"--I think that actually having black friends is a necessity.
2. If you don't have black friends, and never have, and think of black people as something to "be friendly to" from a distance, don't move into a predominantly black neighborhood. I'm not saying that to be hostile, I just don't think it's a good idea. The culture and habits of the people will just be a bit too foreign, and you won't have as easy a time blending in.
3. I really hope and wish CHeights becomes happily and peacefully mixed--with people of all races and sexualities and income levels. It kinda already is, but I think we need more hippies, more artists, and, frankly, even more diversity--more Asians, more Hispanics, and, yes, more White people--because frankly, I think that the more mixed a place is, the better it is...
I suggested this before--I would love it if people in the neighborhood from this blog could form some sort of support network for each other. I wish that we could band together more, instead of attacking strangers who get attacked or who feel racism/reverse racism or whatever else. Sometimes I get so fed up with these attitudes I stop reading this thing, but the truth is, the community needs the blog, and we all need each other, frankly...
If anybody feels the same way, feel free to PM me, and let's try to start some sort of actual community... -
anniewilde, yeah i completely agree. i do have black friends AND white friends, but i dont really spend much time hanging out with anyone at all when im home ( besides sitting on the stoop by myself smoking cigarretes), yeah and i wish i didnt feel like i was fleeing , i just only come home late ( after work and school ) and since i live alone now it just does not feel safe wandering the streets at crackhead o'clock . i completely agree though , i love this area , and when i said " be friendly " i didnt mean that like it was the best i can do . i genuinely do like my neighbors and neighborhood, i just dont know many people.....
thanks for all the feedback
and to nabewatcher , no , no incident report. -
also, I'd say, don't move to
Bushwick to avoid crime--it's super dangerous. I'm not even sure that this neighbhorhood is a super good place for a woman to live alone. I live with a roommate in an apt. building where we all sort of look out for each other...Wherever you live, it's probably best to have a bit more of a support system. Since I moved to CH I've really strategized specifically about how to feel safe here--sometimes I'm met at the subway by my (big male) roommate, sometimes I''ve taken a car. I've talked a lot about it specifically with a black male friend of mine who grew up in BK. He actually suggested trying to make friends with the Bodega people, ironically. I am not a very frequent bodega visitor, though, and I wish they'd be replaced by more functional stores with stuff I could actually buy. I don't think crackhead o'clock is safe. Quite the opposite. That said, wherever you live in NYC, you need to have some people watching your back. Even in Park Slope or Brooklyn Heights or Greenpoint. -
yeah i do have a roommate , however unfortunately our schedules only allow us to see eachother for a second maybe once every two weeks, haha . when i moved down here i had a boyfriend and a dog living in this apt with me , hence i felt much more comfortable in my surroundings. i felt like the bodega had become like a safe place,i went in there like twice a day for cigarettes or soda or soemthing . but i guess the law of odds wasnt on my side on this one. yeah and bushwick definitely isnt much safer , but i have alot of friends, a "support system" there, which makes me feel safer.thnks!
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