wedding budget---out of curiousity

gretch · May 2008

Assuming not everybody is millionair, how much did you spend/ or willing to spend for a wedding?

I am in need to plan for one and am kind of lost looking at those magazines---everythings looks like for people with a lot of budget.

Especially for the dresses, is there really so many people who wants to spend thousands and thousands for a dress that you only ware one time? Or is there some place I can find something reasonable besides J. Crew?

I would love to contribute to the local economy but it seems like I will most likely to be priced out...any opinion/suggestion appreciated.

stoney stomp · May 2008

We're having the same issue. We'd love to have our wedding locally but the prices just seem absurd and we need enough space for at least 140 people.

So we're starting to look at destinations. It's unfortunate though because I love the idea of doing a bang out wedding at Bubby's. But even there, things are not what i'd call "reasonable"

Im curious to see what everyone has to say

livetotravel · May 2008

David's Bridal - they have store in Queens
http://www.davidsbridal.com/weddinglinks/Queens.shtml

RK Bridal W.39th Street
http://rkbridal.com/localpages/new_page_1.htm

gretch · May 2008

Hi Stoney,

Same here! I am entertaining ideas of having it as destination, exactly because of the reason. Even if we could afford people's dinner, I felt bad to ask somebody traveling to come here to spend $300 a night for accomodations....The hotel prices are rediculous.

Therefore the issue of dress remains, which I actually have to find in-town...

Livetotravel,
thanks for the suggestion.

opossumqueen · May 2008

I'm fairly clueless on weddings, but I second David's Bridal. I went with a friend (who had a big budget) to look at dresses there. She found several dresses that I thought were great and the one she ended up getting from there was maybe $700. No idea on prices at local shops other than I've seen one on Atlantic in the Smith/Bond area.

My brother and SIS ditched all their wedding plans once they realized the cost was getting too high and did a destination wedding with just a few family members. Then, when they came home the parents threw a huge, but casual, party that was not too pricey. They showed the video and my mom made a small wedding cake for everyone to share with them. It seemed to work really well for them.

ps sarah · May 2008

We started out with a budget of $20k in mind... we're up to about $36k... and we're doing it in Vermont instead of NY!

http://kvetch.indiebride.com/ is a good resource. My fiance is having a dress designed by someone recommended on their message boards and it's under $800 and gorgeous!

homeowner · May 2008

I'd urge all of you to get on the hunt for sample sales and fundraisers. I was in a wedding where the bride purchased her dress at a charity wedding gown sale. She had originally set aside $3000 for her dress and ended up purchasing a dress at the fundraiser for $500. Many of the dresses were donated by designers and a portion of the proceeds went to benefit Gilda's Club of Westchester, so she felt good buying it.

veets · May 2008

Stoney Stomp wrote: We're having the same issue. We'd love to have our wedding locally but the prices just seem absurd and we need enough space for at least 140 people.

So we're starting to look at destinations. It's unfortunate though because I love the idea of doing a bang out wedding at Bubby's. But even there, things are not what i'd call "reasonable"

Im curious to see what everyone has to say

This post caught my attention because I ate there this evening.. early enough for it still to be "kid hour" and we had a 2 year old but the place is just perfect for a wedding. One of my son's is engaged and he has rejected the place because the times he has been in there for a meal were the kid friendly hours. Gotta have some vision!! The place is just so airey and bright and still warm feeling. Too bad the cost factor does factor it out. I think it would just be such a great place for a wedding.

bergenites · May 2008

We just got married last month, and found lots of ways to cut costs - we did our own invitations (printed them out at a professional printer, but designed them).

I got my dress custom made at Adrienne's Bridal on the LES - they are INCREDIBLE - Gina, the owner will make a dress to fit any budget. Mine was less than $2,000 and it was my absolutely perfect dress.

Also, we had to re-plan our wedding in less than 5 weeks due to family issues (our original wedding was supposed to be in California last weekend, but we got married in NYC in early April). That was stressful and made some things more expensive, but other people were willing to compromise because they wanted to fill the date if they hadn't already.

Biggest ways to save money - on food and drink (i.e. do a cocktail reception rather than a sit-down dinner, wine & prosecco only, instead of a full bar) - photographer - it is ESSENTIAL to have a good one, but if you have any connections try to pull strings - pro photographers in NYC are expensive. We paid over $5,000 for ours (which was much more than I expected), but we needed to find someone quickly (and she was FANTASTIC!).

Also, having a wedding NOT on a Saturday can save money, because many people will have minimum orders for Saturday nights. We had ours on a Sunday, from 4-10, and it was perfect - not too late so people who were local could get back to work the next day, and some out-of-towners only came for the ceremony and cocktails and left before dinner, but that was ok.

If you have any other questions PM me... since I JUST went through this (and in a whirlwind) I could go on for hours...

pureistheword · May 2008

I got married last year. I think the total was like 7-8K.
We had about 75 heads at the Bay Ridge Manor

sjknoll · May 2008

I'm currently in the middle of planning my wedding for this october and yes it is expensive. I lucked out and booked Bubby's last summer before the prices went up. If I was planning now, no way I could have it there. But there are plenty of places to look if you want it in Brooklyn. I do highly recommend Indie Bride, I'm on it all the time and it is a wealth of information. Check out this thread - http://kvetch.indiebride.com/index.php?t=msg&th=30380&start=0&rid=0&S=3d41e8df704cc8db8206d4f72c7d58ac

it's meaty, but worth the read through all the pages (and sorry for the ugly link). All of the women on there are fantastic and if you go to the cutting costs area on Kvetch there is a Brooklyn Help Swap 2008, where a lot of us have gotten together and will be helping out at each others weddings later this year.

As for dresses, I highly highly recommend RK Bridal, I got my dress there for $800 it is a Casablanca dress and most of the dresses in that line are very affordable. One nice thing that RK does is the no frills plan. They give the dress at a significant discount price, but there are no try ons in store after the dress arrives and you cannot have it altered there.

I don't want to keep this post anymore, but please feel free to pm me with any questions you may have and I do have more cost saving ideas/suggestions.

tajmb · May 2008

I tell my husband we need to have a second wedding every time I see the commercial for the grand prospect hall on prospect ave.

As for bargain dress, check vintage shops. Mine cost $200 plus dry cleaning costs. I also really like those J.Crew dresses.

veets · May 2008

tajmb wrote: I tell my husband we need to have a second wedding every time I see the commercial for the grand prospect hall on prospect ave.

As for bargain dress, check vintage shops. Mine cost $200 plus dry cleaning costs. I also really like those J.Crew dresses.

Ech, Ech on Prospect Hall... Unless you have it in the Grand Ballroom which accomodates some obscene number of people, like 600( see Prizzi's Honor if you want the ultimate wedding scene filmed right there!!) Tacky, Tacky... on the other place in this building and the food is terrible.

Since I am not getting married any time soon (again) this is my last contribution to this thread..LOL!... pm me for more information.

stoney stomp · May 2008

sjknoll wrote: I'm currently in the middle of planning my wedding for this october and yes it is expensive. I lucked out and booked Bubby's last summer before the prices went up. If I was planning now, no way I could have it there. But there are plenty of places to look if you want it in Brooklyn. I do highly recommend Indie Bride, I'm on it all the time and it is a wealth of information. Check out this thread - http://kvetch.indiebride.com/index.php?t=msg&th=30380&start=0&rid=0&S=3d41e8df704cc8db8206d4f72c7d58ac

it's meaty, but worth the read through all the pages (and sorry for the ugly link). All of the women on there are fantastic and if you go to the cutting costs area on Kvetch there is a Brooklyn Help Swap 2008, where a lot of us have gotten together and will be helping out at each others weddings later this year.

As for dresses, I highly highly recommend RK Bridal, I got my dress there for $800 it is a Casablanca dress and most of the dresses in that line are very affordable. One nice thing that RK does is the no frills plan. They give the dress at a significant discount price, but there are no try ons in store after the dress arrives and you cannot have it altered there.

I don't want to keep this post anymore, but please feel free to pm me with any questions you may have and I do have more cost saving ideas/suggestions.

We wish we had gotten in then too.

stoney stomp · May 2008

gretch wrote: Hi Stoney,

Same here! I am entertaining ideas of having it as destination, exactly because of the reason. Even if we could afford people's dinner, I felt bad to ask somebody traveling to come here to spend $300 a night for accomodations....The hotel prices are rediculous.

Therefore the issue of dress remains, which I actually have to find in-town...

Livetotravel,
thanks for the suggestion.

Gretch, my lady says check out Jenny Yoo - go to their bridal alternative section. Also some of the bridesmaids dresses are available in ivory
www.jennyyoo.com

That's all i got

amity gal · May 2008

Subject: Wedding Dresses

My sister bought her very beautiful wedding dress in DUMBO at The White Gown (http://www.thewhitegown.com/) during a sample sale. Local designers and very helpful, sweet and genuine staff. Definitely worth checking out.

brooke lynn knight · May 2008

$100, and that went to the guy who did the ceremony (+ $30 tip). We were married in a shower of cherry blossoms, on the Cherry Esplanade at the Brooklyn Botanic Garden.

14 years later, and we're still going strong, and no regrets about the budget wedding. (In fact, my husband was the envy of all his friends!)

The money we saved allowed us to buy our house.

I realize only about 1 out of a hundred thousand women would want to go that route, but I toss this info out in case one of the hundred thousand is reading it: It's possible to get married for next to nothing, and for us, it was the perfect wedding. 8)

daniel · May 2008

We spent $350 on our wedding ceremony at the Brooklyn Botanic Garden. My wife spent $150 on her dress (from a sample sale at a designer's shop in Soho), I spent $900 on my suit from Macy's. Our party at the Beer Garden in Astoria cost about $4500, around 110 people attended.

Our parents spent around $900 on a "rehearsal dinner" the night before our wedding at Bubby's, for around 20 people or so.

apresvu · May 2008

We spent a total of $5000 for everything, including the dress which was not a wedding dress(the idea of wearing one made me gag)that I got at Sak's on sale. We had a friend officiate, had the ceremony at another friends loft. Other friends prepared yummy finger food and drinks for the time at the loft. We had the reception down the street at Tavern on Dean. Mick gave us an awesome deal. We were in the patio and he gave us the back room as well because it was summer and the patio doesn't have a/c but the back room does. Thankfully it wasn't too hot that day. We had a sit down reception and open bar for 70 people. Another friend made the cake. My husband is a musician, so his musician friends played some tunes and we burned cd's with our favorite tunes as well. People were happy to help, we were fortunate.(btw, if you get friends help, don't overburden them, give them one job to do), When I tell people how little we spent they can't believe it. The wedding industry is a money grabbing racket, I was pleased with our "budget" wedding.

underhill_mt · May 2008

Bergenites wrote: Also, we had to re-plan our wedding in less than 5 weeks due to family issues (our original wedding was supposed to be in California last weekend, but we got married in NYC in early April).

I think I met you at Canaille a few weeks ago. My maid of honor and I sat next to you & you hubby 2 nights before my wedding.

We did a Brooklyn wedding for 80 guests 2 weeks ago. We saved by doing a cocktail reception rather than a sit down dinner (guests had their fill of heavy hors d'oeuvres and no one went hungry) at the Brooklyn Historical Society. Prosecco at the bar saved us some champagne costs and we also bought our own liquor - the caterer did setups and provided a tender who served the liquor/wine we bought (got it at Trader Joe's and spent half what we would have elsewhere). We have fantastic photog friends so that was our wedding gift from them. Also, we opted out of the wedding cake and did a sweets table. No one missed the cake and it was so much less expensive.

sjknoll · May 2008

Speaking of cake we are saving a ton of money on it, but having an ice cream cake made by uncle louie g's, I can't freaking wait.

pumpkineater · May 2008

As someone who went through this recently....

For dresses: (1) Check out all sample sales. Kleinfelds has a great one (got mine there). Vera Wang has one 2x a year; a friend got her dress there for $700. (2) Also check out Nicole Miller. Her dresses are simple and many of them are under $1000. (3) And, if you're not opposed to wearing a previously-worn dress, then check out the Bridal Garden. They sell gently worn designer dresses and all proceeds to go to a local children's charity.

For photographers: Check out the local J schools. I'm sure some starving student photographer could shoot your wedding for $500. (I know someone who did this and the photos were fab.)

For cake: Try Costco. Seriously. Their cakes are tasty and they are cheap.

Good luck!!

mpmav1 · May 2008

Subject: Re: wedding budget---out of curiousity

gretch wrote: Assuming not everybody is millionair, how much did you spend/ or willing to spend for a wedding?

I am in need to plan for one and am kind of lost looking at those magazines---everythings looks like for people with a lot of budget.

Especially for the dresses, is there really so many people who wants to spend thousands and thousands for a dress that you only ware one time? Or is there some place I can find something reasonable besides J. Crew?

I would love to contribute to the local economy but it seems like I will most likely to be priced out...any opinion/suggestion appreciated.

Go buy the book Bridal Bargains. Seriously, I bet it saved my wife and I 5,000-8,000k! Needless to say, we were happy. We spent about $15,000k, 300 guests... but it was in Seattle so I can be of little help.

stella · May 2008

Brooke Lynn Knight wrote: $100, and that went to the guy who did the ceremony (+ $30 tip). We were married in a shower of cherry blossoms, on the Cherry Esplanade at the Brooklyn Botanic Garden.

14 years later, and we're still going strong, and no regrets about the budget wedding. (In fact, my husband was the envy of all his friends!)

The money we saved allowed us to buy our house.

I realize only about 1 out of a hundred thousand women would want to go that route, but I toss this info out in case one of the hundred thousand is reading it: It's possible to get married for next to nothing, and for us, it was the perfect wedding. 8)

This sounds WONDERFUL, but I'm wondering if you had any guests or was it just to two of you and the guy who did the ceremony?

teckla · May 2008

More props for Jenny Yoo! Her dresses are simple and affordable - I got mine and my three bridesmaid dresses there and we all looked and felt great.

mylkshayk · May 2008

I must brag and say that I got my wedding dress for $69, on sale from J. Crew!!! (The matching, not-on-sale shoes cost almost 3x the price of the dress.) I say don't be so hard on the 'Crew; you could always get it altered and added to (if you want lacy sleeves beading added, etc.; J. Crew offers simple and affordable basics that you could always add to).

I am in a similar fix, trying to plan an affordable wedding. The fiance and I have to pay for everything ourselves, and i am in the publishing field (hence, low pay), and he is a full-time student! So far I've found that using friends' talents is the way to go: the fiance's brother is an amateur yet excellent photog who is going to do our pix, and a friend of mine loves to bake so she is going to do the cake! We still haven't found a venue yet, but a lot of places in Bklyn (the Bay Ridge area at least) offer wedding meals for about $40 a head.

I really wanted to have photos taken at Empire State Park, under the bridge, you know? But I just read that they require a $100 permit for any size wedding party to photograph. Sheesh!

Anyway, best of luck to you, happy wedding wishes!

mrs. h. · May 2008

Subject: Money-saving tips

I think the easiest way to save money on a wedding is to get that vision of the Saturday night black-tie dinner dance with cocktail hour out of your head. Think of it as a party--the previous poster who opted for a destination wedding followed by a big, casual party in town could just as easily had the big, casual party BE the wedding reception.

I got married at 11 a.m., which meant a daytime suit (or dress) rather than zillion-dollar gown. Reception was at Carmine's (two blocks from the church), where the prix fixe was $36 a person including beer and wine (7 years ago--may be more now). All totaled, it was $6,400 for 75 people.

Another thing--when you're talking to vendors, don't use the word "wedding." Say it's a big family party or such. The word wedding causes prices to go up. Similarly, if using online vendors for decorations or favors or something like that, stay away from wedding-specific ones.

Good luck!

jane_birkin · May 2008

i second the Yuck on the Grand Prospect Hall. the food there is barely edible. In addition to the J.Crew dresses, a good budget option is Ann Taylor. they have a small wedding line where the dresses are $200. very basic and then you can add any embellishments you desire. also, it is prom season and there are always white or champagne-colored evening dresses for sale at Macy's, Bloomingdales, Nordstrom's etc. I find those dresses to be more beautiful than regular wedding dresses, and at a fraction of the price.

Another poster mentioned Bay Ridge Manor-- if you have any elderly or semi-disabled guests you will not want to have it there. The bathroom is down a steep flight of stairs and there is no elevator. It is a major flaw of the place; someone fell there a few years ago and broke a hip.

stacey · May 2008

I agree about the Grand Prospect Hall - food is crappy.
Jane makes a good point about the bathroom at Bay Ridge Manor otherwise the food and service was pretty nice there.
I was married at Sirico's on 13th Ave and have been to many many parties there. I happen to think that they have fantastic food and the service is wonderful. They work with your budget and have good suggestions. I just went to a wedding catered there and asked her approximately what her cost was. She said by having it on a a Monday (which was Martin Luther King Day) and she had a buffet style wedding with a separate cocktail hour, open bar, plus a vienese (sp?) hour she only spent about $30 per person. Another person who had their reception there had it on a Sunday afternoon, beer and wine service, and just a buffet style diner and it was close to $25 per person. Both had the wedding cake included.
I also suggest you go to some of these wedding expo's they have at various locations. Many times you can find photographers, etc. at these places.

Good luck!

kikintina · May 2008

I got my dress on eBay. I ended up buying two (for a total of $110) and had the one I liked better hemmed for $100. I had invites done at a party store in Bensonhurst (where a former student got me a discount) for around $45. I got shoes at Loehmann's. My husband wore his nicest suit. We had the actual marriage done at City Hall, so we just had a friend officiate at the ceremony a few days later. My sisters (bridesmaids) just wore something happy and nice, no rules except for being relatively casual.

It was AWESOME. We did it WAY out of town, but ended up spending just under $10 K. If you want to do a wedding in Maine, PM me for the rec. It was a fantastic party, and the food rocked.

mistybuttons · May 2008

when my husband and i decided to get married we knew we didn't want a conventional wedding... the idea of starting our lives together in debt or begging our parents for big bucks made my head swim. we ended up getting married this past february and it was perfect for us - brooklyn city hall for $35 bucks with immediate family and then we all went to floyd and played bocce until dinner at Patois on smith street. it was delicious and it cost under 3K with (way too much) really good champagne.
with all the money we saved on the wedding we were able to afford a really great honeymoon and we are throwing a big BBQ this summer for all our friends. i wouldn't have changed a thing!

i realize this is not common... without knowing anything about prices i think it would be nice to get married in litchfield manor (i think that's what it is called) in prospect park. it would be really pretty and a great setting for kids and adults alike. it might be expensive though.

wedding budget---out of curiousity

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