How to piss off a Park Slope resident

#86 Threaten to kick both their mom's butts.

#88 Walk down 7th avenue, and while looking in each realtor's window along the way, exclaim loudly to your partner "I don't think we should live here, it's not very diverse".

Just post something on this board. Anything will do. Someone will be pissed off.

WhyFi wrote: WTF IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?! :evil: :twisted: :evil: :twisted: :evil:

You'd understand if you weren't so gentrified! Back in MY day...!

Em26, see #77.

New #90...

Call yourself Smartmom and refer to yourself in the third person. Regale the neighborhood with mundane tales of your unexceptional and irritating rugrats.

Edited to add:

Now that Em26 has changed #90, there's no need for a new #90, so this is actually #91. Just so y'all know.

Em26 wrote: # 90

Call them cult loving , tea lounge stealing , dog pooping bastards !

You saw someone pooping out little dogs? Are they pure-bred? You could make some cash off that.

Just kidding. I know what you mean.

Tremendous thread. However, I thought that "pissed off self importance" was merely the natural state for slopers. So you don't really have to do anything.

Brooke Lynn Knight wrote: People, we can't let this die before we make the century -- 100 posts. I think if we reach 101, we should publish it as a free pamphlet and distribute it to a waiting city.

#92 (based on personal experience) Put squirrel deterrents on your newly planted, expensive perennials so they don't get dug up before they have a chance to root.

(Result: Lecture on how the "squirrels were here first." Really? I've been in my house for 10 years. Lifespan of a grey squirrel: 3-4 years. Ergo, I was here first, so shut your sanctimonious soy-hole.)

ummm . . . apologies for the digression: what's a good squirrel deterrent? I spread pieces of chicken wire around and try to cover them with mulch, but it still looks awful. Got something that works well but doesn't smell and won't poison the neighbors' cats?

Nearly a year later...'bout time this thread gets a few more.

#93 = Tell them that sorry, the notion of asking where's the "Park Slope" of Charlotte NC, Boulder CO or Basra, Iraq just sounds a bit silly. Well, maybe not the last one. Well played, that one.

#94 = Send out the small, light bundle of school acceptance letters and wait-list letters, along with the huge rafts of non-acceptance letters.

#95 = As a joke, install several (fake) parking meters in the few spots remaining along 6th and 7th Ave in the South Slope.

#96 = Stare down 7th or 5th Ave sidewalk and shout "OBAMA SUCKS!" Quickly turn 180 degrees and shout "HILLARY SUCKS!" Duck into nearest real estate office doorway and see what ensues.

jeffrey wrote: Nearly a year later...'bout time this thread gets a few more.

#93 = Tell them that sorry, the notion of asking where's the "Park Slope" of Charlotte NC, Boulder CO or Basra, Iraq just sounds a bit silly. Well, maybe not the last one. Well played, that one.

#94 = Send out the small, light bundle of school acceptance letters and wait-list letters, along with the huge rafts of non-acceptance letters.

#95 = As a joke, install several (fake) parking meters in the few spots remaining along 6th and 7th Ave in the South Slope.

#96 = Stare down 7th or 5th Ave sidewalk and shout "OBAMA SUCKS!" Quickly turn 180 degrees and shout "HILLARY SUCKS!" Duck into nearest real estate office doorway and see what ensues.

HA HA HA HA HA HA HA

That is some funny stuff.

Please do not make us wait a whole year before you come up with some more.

sterling2000 wrote: #97 = Ask them to do the math on how old they will be when one of their three adopted children hit college.

#99(?) = Vote McCain (who should also consult #97)

Announce that the "Healthy Choices Week" at 321 is sponsored by Monsanto.

Actually, it'd be fun to wear one of those shirts to a Madonna concert. But you'd pretty much have to have a trust fund to be able to afford to go.

alafairnadia wrote: [quote=sterling2000][quote=sterling2000]#97 = Ask them to do the math on how old they will be when one of their three adopted children hit college.

#99(?) = Vote McCain (who should also consult #97)

#100 - announce via posters at the co-op that barack obama supports genetically modified food.
Actually, as was established ad nauseum in the GM foods at the co-op thread, most co-op members have no problem with GM food, to the consternation of a a small and very vocal minority.

Subject: The best way

to piss off a Park Slope resident?

Here's one:

Try your best to be a complete moron by continuously trying to reinforce the notion that all Park Slope residents are the same, which may be best accomplished by compiling a list of almost witty one-liners on some dumb-ass Internet message board, and then pretending like you've done something either worthwhile or clever! Awesome!

Please, please somebody (this means you, sympathetic Russian hacker!) launch a denial of service attack on every single Website that features the term "Park Slope resident."