Man I'm so screwed

armchair_warrior wrote:
I still want kids and dates close to my age. When i get too old, girls can't have kids naturally any more.

I wouldn't worry too much about this one either; the expiry date on having kids is way way over-hyped. In the unlikely event you aren't snapped up by 45, there'll still be plenty of 40-year olds who are ready and able.

If I can suggest one thing: take up a hobby that's dominated by members of the opposite sex. For the ladies, I recommend outdoorsy adventure sporty things, fantasy gaming, LAN parties, medieval weapons associations, etc. For guys, it could be dance (tango, salsa, ballroom, etc.), book clubs, yoga and some parts of the new age circuit, certain kinds of community service.

i date asians (in response to big guy, above me)... sadly, armchair, you are too young for me and more so, i'm not breeding.

and he wants a young girl who can have kids, which rules me out.

I dated a WASP or two. We did it while admiring the Van Buren china.

i'm really an 85 year old woman. ask flexi, she saw me in the park. old as the hills

my studio is in billyburg, it's true. but closer to hasidim than hipsters.

that's right, i forgot, you were with your service dog. ;-)

Well, I can't believe I'm going to tell this story and ask if it's generally true, because I can feel the shitstorm of a race thread a'comin, but.....

One night I was out in Manhattan at a bar and this guy was hitting on me. He was black, I'm white (ok, half-Latina, but nobody ever realizes that....whatever). He started stereotyping ME (ha!) and saying stuff like "I bet you only go out with white guys".

Me: Nope. In fact, the guy I'm dating right now is Chinese

Him: Well, as an educated, good-looking black man (humble, much?!), I have the upper hand over Asian guys when I'm out at a bar. I know it and they know it

Me: WTF are you talking about?

Him: I'm serious! Chicks will be all over me before they go for the Asian guy.

Me: Um. Ok. Whatever. Goodnight.


So, I go home, and the guy I'm dating comes over and I ask him about it.

He says "the guy is right. In a bar, a woman will go right past an Asian guy to the black guy.....for dating....it's a dynamic that both races know about. However, when they want to MARRY, they'll marry the Asian....it pisses the white parents off a little bit less".

It was quite an eye opening conversation for me.

Disclaimer - am repeating a converstaion. Not trying to start shit. But, it did make me curious as to this dynamic that I never noticed before and which they both seemed to think was accurate.

Anyone?

armchair_warrior wrote: yes asian males mostly are ignored but when they do, they either portray us as fu man chu types or asexual beings.

asian girls on the other hand is accepted by the media and general public.

really? I just find that the more aggressive the guy, the more attention he's going to get. if I'm sitting at a bar (or lan party or walking out of best buy with a bag full of psp games) I find that the only guys who talk to me, comment about my purchases, say howdy, etc, are black or hispanic. now, granted, I'm not a thin girl, so I don't fall into culturally acceptable attractiveness standards in a lot of areas of the world. on the street, mostly get attention from blacks, hispanics or middle eastern/south asian guys (the kebab guy on the corner of 53rd and 6th asks me out every day. yay). interestingly, the only asian guys I've ever *cough*been*cough* with were korean (one of whom was freakin' super femme bisexual). (and so was the one asian chick, but that was just drunken making out) and they were def the sexual aggressors (and also drunk).

so....

maybe you just need to be more aggressive. I think you're just buying in way too much to the 'meek' and 'shy' and 'weak' stereotypes. if the stereotype pisses you off, kill it.

well, honestly, I'm not trying to date white dudes (though I wouldn't say no to those pretty glaswegians I found in london - again, aggressive). I don't care who gives me attention - I enjoy talking to people and dating whoever isn't an asshole. I just notice it. cause ... as you're saying, it's obvi who gives you attention!

alafairnadia wrote:
so....

maybe you just need to be more aggressive. I think you're just buying in way too much to the 'meek' and 'shy' and 'weak' stereotypes. if the stereotype pisses you off, kill it.

For some reason I'm getting this weird image of AW having taken your advice to its logical extreme, and next time we see him, being 7' tall, hairy, built like a Panzer, and exhibiting 'roid rage.

Don't do it. Find a shy librarian instead, and rescue her from the clutches of an evil self-help organization, then live happily ever after. That would be much more romantic.

Its all about looks....looks , looks , looks!

If you saw a man or woman that is beautiful.....and his/her race is usually not one that you'd date...would you really just back off , forget that you are attracted to that person?

Okay , so say that you become friends with said person....and you realize that he/she is such a nice person....beautiful inside as well.....and you really like him/her , would you tell that person how you feel , or would you walk away because you have never preferred to date a person of his/her race?

The people who say that they wouldn't date an Asian man or woman , most likely has never met a person from that race that they find themselves attracted to.....so they then think that ALL Asians(or whatever race) are unattractive and undateable...those people are usually the ones that say that they wouldn't date a man/woman from a specific race.