meeting people ... not necesarily dates
hey... i moved to the area about a year and a half ago... i work in a small office and didn't know many people when i got here. accordingly, it's been hard to meet people to just be, you know, friends with. specifically, other women friends. anyway - i was just wondering if people had any suggestions for semi-structured activities or places to make new acquaintances. i never had trouble making friends in school, but being a grown up in a place like nyc is pretty alienating sometimes....
thanks!
thanks!
Comments
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there is always those meets we have. just keep an eye out on the sticky's on the ps and ph boards.
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also, check out meetup.com. You can search for stuff you like and then hang out with people who like said stuff too.
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I definitely remember feeling that way when I first moved to NYC. Good suggestions so far. Do you knit? Yarn Guy has a good knitting group that meets around here. Also try New York Cares.
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Emily, to warm to knit, the wool keeps felting in my hands. But I'm starting it up again the fall. You do meet some nice folks while knitting though.
So, where to meet people... try these.
1) You can meet people in a neighborhood bar, but they're mostly likely drunk and may not remember your name. Maybe its good they don't remember you. Hmmmm.
Freddy's has some fun stuff, here's a link to their calendar.Diorama Night, Speeling Bee, Opera, Cringe and the like. The Black Sheep Pub has a regular Trvia Night. Hanks has "Live Band" country karaoke.
2) The Brooklyn Museum's First Saturday is pretty cool, although I haven't been there since winter.
3) The Brooklyn Public Library has reading series. I though it was cool, but the cookies were stale. Enough said about that.
4) Have you tried any of the volunteer stuff (NOT the Food Co-op) like the Audubon Society or the Brooklyn Botanic Garden? They always need some help. LauraB.'s cat rescue seemd to bring a lot of pet lovers together.
5) You can join a community garden, very intense plant folk there.
6) The morning dog run in the park. Works best if you have a dog, otherwise you'll come off as a "creepy" dog stalker.
Well, I'm outta material. -
Try signing up for some adult ed classes at local schools. I met one of my close friends when we both took a rock climbing class at NYU.
Volunteering for just about any activity. Growing up in the city one of my favorite things was working at some of the big events in Central Park (Race for the Cure, Walk America, etc.)
Join a local political club.
Call your friends back home and find out if anyone knows other folks living here that they can put you in touch with. I've made some good friends when I lived elsewhere through the two and three degrees of separation.
Neighborhood bar is always good as long as you believe in moderation... -
sister you aren't alone. alot of us alone half the time. i spend my time posting on message boards to kill time and loneliness.
just hang in there. -
I've met some of the best people through my job. My best friend was a customer that I always chatted with when she came in to buy wine. It took us a year to get up the nerve to suggest meeting up outside work. We both thought the other would think it was weird and 4 years later we're still great friends. My point is that if there's a store you go in often and you hit it off with someone that works there, don't be afraid to suggest lunch or a drink or whatever. Chances are that they're thinking the same thing but feel it might be crossing the line as an employee of the store.
I'm a woman and I've become friends with about 4 or 5 women in the 6 and a half years I've been at my job. It's cool since I doubt we would have met any other way. I consider myself very lucky to have such interesting and diverse people as friends. So, that's a possibility you may not have thought of. -
No need for all that. Simply go to any bar on Vanderbilt, 7th, or 5th Avenue that does not have an Irish name and you will find a large number of people who are eerily similar to you.
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Restless Native wrote: No need for all that. Simply go to any bar on Vanderbilt, 7th, or 5th Avenue that does not have an Irish name and you will find a large number of people who are eerily similar to you.
Does that work? I tried to go to a bar to meet people. I tried to talk to a woman at a bar, and I believe she thought I (another female) was hitting on her. Then I met a couple of women who seemed cool. We spoke briefly, but they were doing their own thing. I've met everyone through work and school, but I'd like to meet non school/work people too! -
I agree the bar scene can be a little awkward. Try craigslist groups and activities - you can find pickup sports, book groups, things like that. Maybe we should organize a transplants happy hour. I'm a woman in my 30s, newish to brooklyn, would love to meet some more of my neighbors.
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That is a great idea. If you need any help organizing let me know. There are a lot of great places around for us to meet up!
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Ok, great. I like Soda but totally open to suggestions. If we tell them we're doing it, they might even help promote it. What day do you think is good?
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I met a lot of people - bartenders, regulars, Soda regulars - when I first moved to the neighborhood by having dinner at Half once or twice a month. I haven't been able to replicate that at any of the other neighborhood establishments, though.
I also have met a ton of folks through the happy hours that the board sets up. I'd suggest coming to the next happy hour or just starting a post about a happy hour - people will show up.
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wanderer wrote: Ok, great. I like Soda but totally open to suggestions. If we tell them we're doing it, they might even help promote it. What day do you think is good?
Soda is very cool with a cool patio too. You can post it on the board with a poll and see what day works best! -
I understand how it feels to move to a new place and not know anyone. I tried all sorts of strategies to meet interesting people and make friends the first time I migrated. Then I discovered misanthropy. Problem solved.
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Sounds like a plan. I'm well on my way. In the meantime, how about a Soda get together one day this month?
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Didn't read all the replies to this post so not sure if someone suggested this already, but taking a class in something you enjoy is a great way to meet people. Obviously everyone in the class has the same interests, are there for the same reason. And it doesn't have to be Adult Ed or something that formal.. could be anything, whatever your interest is and you've never pushed yourself to do it. And you might feel tired after work, but even one day a week could open up your world. Even a yoga or meditation class would make you feel less isolated.
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While walking back from the Atlantic Terminal this AM (after having given up on getting to work) I passed a Tavern...I think it was on Dean and Underhill. Anyone know if it's a nice alternative to Soda?
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EmmaViz wrote: While walking back from the Atlantic Terminal this AM (after having given up on getting to work) I passed a Tavern...I think it was on Dean and Underhill. Anyone know if it's a nice alternative to Soda?
Depends on what you're looking for. If it's food and drink, yes. If you're looking for the Soda vibe, I would say no.
Oh, don't double-tip your first time there - they add gratuity to the tab. -
EmmaViz wrote: While walking back from the Atlantic Terminal this AM (after having given up on getting to work) I passed a Tavern...I think it was on Dean and Underhill. Anyone know if it's a nice alternative to Soda?
I happen to enjoy going to Tavern on Dean. Its a much more friendlier crowd than Soda. They have a great brunch menu also. If you want to check it out why not go on Sunday when Quig will be having his art showing. -
Stellar rec, stacey. I might check it out! What are the brunch prices/is the price range?
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Ok, how about wednesday, august 22 for a general meetup at soda? I'll post it in a new thread if nobody objects to the date -
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Sure. But noone beats Beast. Very friendly staff and a stellar late-night happy hour.
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I'm in!
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I haven't been to Beast yet... I'm somewhat of a Soda regular (I'm pretty sure the bartender that looks like Anthony Soprano knows me)... the crowd there does seem a bit cold but I just chalked that up to them being NY'ers. Soda has an awesome jukebox though, the DJs are good too... right out of my damn Ipod.
How does Beast compare in those regards? I might check it out Saturday. -
Cool The Kid wrote: I haven't been to Beast yet... I'm somewhat of a Soda regular (I'm pretty sure the bartender that looks like Anthony Soprano knows me)... the crowd there does seem a bit cold but I just chalked that up to them being NY'ers. Soda has an awesome jukebox though, the DJs are good too... right out of my damn Ipod.
beast is pretty different than soda. the place is primarily a restaurant, so the bar area is only really comfortably a bar area when the restaurant aspect closes. also, the kitchen is not tucked away behind a big door or something so food smells are omnipresent - I'm not the biggest fan of that.
How does Beast compare in those regards? I might check it out Saturday.
awesome factors: great wine for not a lot (same albarino as bar jamon for $9 less a quartino), lesbian owned & operated for the most part (with a few totally hot gay boys thrown in for variety - adorable), and the kitchen staff plays a mean game of poker - I speak of the cattyshack chairty tournament in which I played against a few of them and ultimately came in 3rd (pats self on back). -
plus, as the summer ends and the national politics start ramping up towards primaries, etc etc., i'm sure there's going to be a ton of activities going on in our neighborhoods. (if you're a liberal, that is. i don't know that there are a lot of conservative activities in these parts.) personally, i plan to completely submerge myself.
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I like Flatbush Farm a lot - very cool people there (and I ran into some long lost friends from a looooong time ago, too.) OK, it's not "officially" in PH...They have great BBQ's, and it's very welcoming, like Beast.
To the original poster: are you interested in swing dancing or salsa? Trust me - you will meet a LOT of people that way, and learn something new (or improve your skills.) Just one more suggestion to add to the previously mentioned great ideas.
One more thing - have you ever had the desire to foster a dog or cat? Dogs especially are a magnet for meeting people! (Obviously not the only reason to get one...) -
So are we still meeting at Soda on the 22nd?
Howdy, Stranger!
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