This site is closed to new comments and posts.

Notice: This site uses cookies to function.
If you are not comfortable with cookies then please don't browse this website.

Ladies! Sing Your Asses Off And Win Mediocre Prizes! — Brooklynian

Ladies! Sing Your Asses Off And Win Mediocre Prizes!

the yarn monkey
the yarn monkey
edited November -1 in Prospect Heights
Ladies! Sing Your Asses Off And Win Mediocre Prizes!

Calling all sad girls, bad girls, mad girls and the like. The muscial killing fields are yours next Wednesday, January 17. It's Ladies Night at the Sing and Win a Ham contest at Freddy's. This month Bill C and I return to our native homeland, Cleveland, in the Honshu Prefecture. Welcome back guest hammy hostesses, Heather "H-Bomb" McCabe and Tabitha "Rockin'" Rivera.

People have asked if only the ladies win the hams, of course not. They also win other mediocre prizes!! The rest is just a mere coincidence. This month you can win:

First Prize: A 48 oz can of porcine pleasure (ladies only)
Second Prize: A three-line GE multi-line speaker phone (comes in black only), feels like the office!
Third Prize: Post-Its. I said POST-ITs! Whooo! 2 packs of Trader Joe's Chili & Lime Thai style Peanuts

Ring in 2007 with the Big Bohemian finale at 12:30, there and abouts.

Wednesday January 17, 2007
From 9:30ish until 12:30 there and abouts
at Freddy's
485 Dean Street (corner Dean + 6av)
www.karaokebigassham.com

Comments

  • the yarn monkey
    the yarn monkey
    Just five more days to get yoru hands on a ham!
  • the yarn monkey
    the yarn monkey

    Subject: Wow, chick songs!

    We've been asked about vegan solutions for prizes. Our solution, a GE 3-line phone! Also we've been told that the Ladies' Night is sexist. Well, just by Heather and Tabby. And that statement is correct.

    We don't have the song "Ladies' Night", which a bit lame on our part. But let's face it, but that songs sucks. We have many songs that suck much less such:
    - Fernando, Knowing Me Knowing You (Abba)
    - I Love the Night Life (Alicia Bridges)
    - It's Oh So Quiet (Bjork)
    - One Way, Hanin' On The Telephone (Debbie Harry)
    - Toxic, Ooops, Baby One More time (Britney Spears)
    - Close To You, Superstar (Karen Carpenter)
    - 9 to 5, I will Always Love You (Dolly Poarton)
    - What A Feeling, Fame (Irene Cara)
    - I am Woman (ole Aussie whats'ername)

    a whole slew of Olivia Newton John, Joan Jett, Madonna, Peggy Lee and so much more. If I could turn Back time (Cher) is a guys song. There is no crying in karaoke, you must be present to collect your prize and you must sing (lady-like) to win.
  • alafairnadia
    alafairnadia
    do you have my two karaoke songs?
    "goldfinger" by shirley bassey
    "murder by numbers" by the police
  • armchair_warrior
    armchair_warrior
    can a single guy attend this thing :p. seems interesting to see girls hehe sing :).
  • the yarn monkey
    the yarn monkey
    Alafairnadia, yes we have "Gold Finger", we don't have "Murder by Numbers" but we do have "Roxanne". And Armchair, yes you can sit if you want. Karaoke is not just a complex competative blood sport, it's also a great spectator sport. But beware, in Thailand there are creatures only known as "boy-girls". Most men can see through their charade, but after a few drinks... sailors look out!

    If you're that shy you can join in on the big Bohemian ending when everyone in the room gets up and sings "Bohemian Rhapsody".
  • alafairnadia
    alafairnadia
    please note that I can't actually sing. I only like songs I can "speak". my skillzz are limited.
  • the yarn monkey
    the yarn monkey
    If Eartha Kitt can talk her way through a song (and most of her career), so can you. be brave and be bold.
  • ana.log
    ana.log
    If you can get Rufus Wainwright's "My Phone's on Vibrate for You" i swear I will come and sing it.
  • the yarn monkey
    the yarn monkey

    Subject: Bummer!!!

    Dear Ms. Log,

    Bummer, the only Rufus Wainwright songs we have are "Hallelujah", the love theme from "Schrek", and "King Of The Road", the love theme from that gay cowboy movie "Memoirs of a Geisha". But in march the new Rufus tune we have is "Tell me Somthing Good".

    How about doing that song they use for last skate at the rink, "Eternal Flame"? Or something pretty like, "Rappers Delight", all 11 pages of it.
  • armchair_warrior
    armchair_warrior
    boygirl heard that one before :). hehe hmm might show up just for watching this :p.
  • the yarn monkey
    the yarn monkey

    Subject: Low-tech Reminder

    armchair_warrior wrote: boygirl heard that one before :). hehe hmm might show up just for watching this :p.
    Oh, give it a try. Take a look at the our fabulous list of over 300 songs! That's right, over 300. http://www.karaokebigassham.com/list.html

    A reminder, this is low-tech karaoke. There's no bouncing ball at this singing shin-dig. Here's how we do it.

    1) Over the song list, write your song ID# and your Karaoke name on a ticket:

    #50191 (Wimoweh by Yma Sumac)
    "Hugh Jorgan"

    2) Get your lyrics from Tabby
    3) Give your ticket to Heather
    4) Wait to be called (drink optional)
    5) Sing or talk with feeling (dance optional)
    6) Return printed lyric to Tabby

    There's no trash talk and no crying in low-tech karaoke. Repechage is allowed, but that's completely up to the host(esses). It can get rough on stage. Last month I nearly got knocked into the wall by the "Fame/Irene Cara" dancers during short the instrumental.
  • pensodyssey
    pensodyssey
    Ms. Vickers (who is technically allowed in, since she is a lady) will only appear if you have Roxy Music's "In every dream home, a heartache".
  • the yarn monkey
    the yarn monkey

    Subject: Nuts to you

    Mr. and Mz. Vickers,

    We have no Roxy Music or Bryan Ferry. How about trying "Have You Ever been Mellow" by Olivia Newton John? Or maybe a duet with yourselves to the tune of "Summer Nights". You might be thinking "That's like getting a Fudgy the Whale instead of a Cookie Puss!" You may be right, ONJ is incongruent to BF[RM].

    Also, after waiting in line at Trader Joe's for an hour, I found they were out of Chili & Lime Thai Style Peaunuts (and eco-friendly dish soap). But fear nut, I found others. Here they are in order of Scoville Scale.
    - Wasabi Peas (burning Ninja poison)
    - Thai Lime & Chili Cashews (slow ethnic heat)
    - Chili Lemon Pistachios (so-so heat)
    - Marcona Almonds (no heat)

    Third place never tasted to good.
  • the yarn monkey
    the yarn monkey

    Subject: To Serve Ham

    image
    People have asked so we're answering.

    Katherine from Bergen Street asks:
    "If I win the ham, what do I do with it?"

    Dear Katherine, Cook it! Rinse and then bake this boneless beauty in orange juice and mustard 1 to 1 1/2 hours in 325 degree oven. Dot with cloves and baste often with it's own juices. Last half hour glaze with 1 cup brown sugar, juice from 1 orange. Garnish with a pineapple and cherries to make a clown face.

    Here are more ideas from Cooks.com

    Dawn from sixth Avenue asks:
    "Ew, what's that sticky stuff on the outside?"

    Relax Dawn, that's just the protective slime layer. In nature, slugs and parrot fish have this layer too as part of their immune system. You must wash your canned ham twice, and let it air dry for half and hour.

    Hillary from Propect Place asks:
    "I left my canned ham on a shelf last year and now the can is expanding. What do I do?"

    Hillary, oh my God! A swelling can means that the protective slime layer is now compromised beyond repair. Methane can ignite with static electricity alone. Throw it out. In the future keep your canned ham refigerated at all times.

    For this and more go to www.krakusfoods.com. Good luck ladies, you must sing to win.
  • the yarn monkey
    the yarn monkey

    Subject: Aloha and Mahalo

    As we bid a warm aloha to this topic, we'd like to thank our wahines of wonder, Heather and Tabby for their awesome mele hosting skills. A freakin' lao lao shout-out to the lady that won the ham. You put so much soul into "Open Arms" that I thought the rink was really closing. Dave, enjoy the vegan-friendly 3-line GE phone. And to the many winners of Trader Joe's fabulous selection of roasted and flavored nuts, a big and gracious mahalo. We hope your New Year is enjoyable, memorable and unaffected by the recent rise in crime. Now let's watch this topic sink to the bottom of the list. See you next month! Pao!
Sign In or Register to comment.

Howdy, Stranger!

It looks like you're new here. If you want to get involved, click one of these buttons!

Sign In

Categories