News Flash: We're not ALL Criminals
Subject: News Flash: We're not ALL Criminals
Ok, since my last rant was so "successful," this time I will try not to inflame emotions, make wild claims about my skateboarding abilities, or say anything bad about bikers.This has been touched upon in the past but it's been bugging me so much that I had to get it in a post. For the past few weeks, I have noticed white women crossing the street when they see me walking toward them, or grabbing their purses as they walk past me. It's not the first time this has happened, but it is really infuriating. I've never thought that I project any kind of negativity or agression, and in my opinion, I'm not thugged out, nor do I look like a criminal. What gives? Have you been overdosing on C.O.P.S.? It's funny in a cynical way, but really sad, too.
Sometimes I feel like some of you are waiting for the rest of us to move out of the neighborhood before you can strut around here carefree? Truth is, you're living in what is still predominantly a neighborhood of color. Maybe it's time you get used to those of us who still live here. Maybe if you're so scared you should move. I guarantee you that 99.9% of the Black men walking around here aren't criminals, and don't want to rob you, regardless of how they are dressed.
Please note that I am not accusing all white women of thinking this way, or engaging in that type of behavior.
Anybody familiar with the laws pertaining to Black rage?
Comments
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i'm not saying you're doing this, but sometimes i notice people giving me the "you're a racist" death stare when in fact, i just need to cross the street. so as long as we're on the topic...attention, people giving me the racism death stare: sometimes i just need to go somewhere that is on the other side of the street. (and then sometimes i realize i've screwed it up and have to cross back, and then i'm sure everybody thinks i'm a real asshole, but there ya go.)
also, on the extremely rare occasion that i do cross the street because of personal safety concerns, it is about 100,000 times more likely that i am concerned about a person being a man than about his race. in this neighborhood, as you note, there's a fair chance that the man in question might not be white. but i've crossed the street for white men, too, and i've had white men lecture me about not being afraid of white men, but i'll stop crossing the street when women stop getting hassled and worse by men.
mostly, though, i'm far too lazy for this kind of snub. -
i'm not saying you're doing this, but sometimes i notice people giving me the "you're a racist" death stare when in fact, i just need to cross the street. so as long as we're on the topic...attention, people giving me the racism death stare: sometimes i just need to cross the street.
Point noted, and understood. I would say that's fair. Thank you for responding and explaining the way you did. -
*EDIT* I'll calm my tone down.
Basically I c/s with sweet tea. Relax, it's not that serious. -
Sorry to hear about your recent experiences w/white ladies in the neighborhood. I don't know why people feel the need to shuffle their belongings around to "avoid" having a purse snatched. They must be reading too many police logs in the PSlope papers. Purse snatchings happen there all the time (it seems like).
What's the point of crossing the street to avoid you? If that is going to be their tactic to avoid men of color in this neighborhood, they will surely get tired of having to zig-zag their way to their destinations ALL the time. Maybe they will either change their minds about their "safety" and give up the tactic, or move on to the next neighborhood. It's hard to avoid people who don't look/dress just like you in NYC, nevermind ProHi!!!
I'm not slowing my roll to avoid anyone,, if you want to mess w/a 5.1" red head w/a nasty temper...do you! I can come w/it too!
BTW, maybe greeting these chics w/a "Hey, how ya doing?" (when you see them start to do their thing) might help! Not that that's your responsibility. -
sweet tea wrote: i'm not saying you're doing this, but sometimes i notice people giving me the "you're a racist" death stare when in fact, i just need to cross the street.
I hate it when I'm naturally walking at about the same pace of a woman that's 10-20 paces ahead of me, and she happens to take every turn that I need to take - I usually get the feeling that they think that I'm following them, when I'm just trying to get to where I'm going... I occasionally get the urge to say, "I'm not following you! Really!"
I also get plenty of the crossing-the-street thing when I'm walking my dog. In some ways I'm slightly offended, in others, I understand... even though I don't think that it's at all justified. -
kick rocks!!!! wrote: BTW, maybe greeting these chics w/a "Hey, how ya doing?" (when you see them start to do their thing) might help! Not that that's your responsibility.
You're right, it's not my responsibility to make a white woman feel safe to walk past me.hate it when I'm naturally walking at about the same pace of a woman that's 10-20 paces ahead of me, and she happens to take every turn that I need to take - I usually get the feeling that they think that I'm following them, when I'm just trying to get to where I'm going... I occasionally get the urge to say, "I'm not following you! Really!"
That's so funny because I have that experience all the time! -
liftandcut wrote:
That's so funny because I have that experience all the time!
[quote=WhyFi] hate it when I'm naturally walking at about the same pace of a woman that's 10-20 paces ahead of me, and she happens to take every turn that I need to take - I usually get the feeling that they think that I'm following them, when I'm just trying to get to where I'm going... I occasionally get the urge to say, "I'm not following you! Really!"
So true.
This is gold... It's like a premise from a lost Seinfeld episode. -
I also get plenty of the crossing-the-street thing when I'm walking my dog. In some ways I'm slightly offended, in others, I understand... even though I don't think that it's at all justified.
Yeah, some chick grabbed her purse last night when I was walking my brother's dog. Granted, the street light was out and he is a 90lb Amstaff. But still, I WAS wearing a Wellfleet Oysters t-shirt. -
This happens to me all the time too. Except that I'm not black. My kids tell me it is because I look "mean", WTF? I actually got the cops called on me MULTIPLE TIMES yesterday in northern NJ for sitting in a park. Retards. At least the two cop cars that showed up contained reasonable white folk. Kidding! The responding cops were actually quite diverse. Well, for northern NJ.
Anyway, maybe it isn't because you're black, maybe it is because you are an ugly mofo like me. In any case, try to look more on the funny/haha side of it than the funny/sad side. -
liftandcut wrote: Yeah, some chick grabbed her purse last night when I was walking my brother's dog. Granted, the street light was out and he is a 90lb Amstaff. But still, I WAS wearing a Wellfleet Oysters t-shirt.
If I'm going to worry about anything, it's not going to be a pocketbook. As my neighbor once expressed to me, when looking at my dog - "I just can't help but picture her chomping my balls in to oblivion."
I'm still trying to teach Lucy to growl in a menacing fashion upon hearing the "obliviate balls!" command. -
daver wrote: ...maybe it is because you are an ugly mofo like me.
Skateboarding faceplants at 40mph will do that to ya...
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Basically, what sweet tea said.
I rarely cross the street to avoid anyone, but on the rare occasions that I do it's because it's a man or, more likely, a group of teenagers, regardless of race.
It's totally true that it's not your responsibility to make a white woman feel safe to walk past you. At the same time, it's not my responsibility to ignore my own self-preservation instincts to make other people feel better.
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are you walking around with that pit bull still (I was assuming you were dog sitting)? I don't generally cross the street b/c of dogs, but I've definitely had some really nasty shit talked at me by men walking pit bulls. for example, once outside of yelison, a guy's pit (clearly still in possession of his goods), was sniffing my leg and kinda following me. the guy declared loudly that his dog smelled pussy and wanted it. I kinda wanted to chortle and say that yes, indeed, I do have cats, but instead chose not to be a smart ass and went home.
otherwise, no clue why the crossing-the-street behavior would be on the upswing. bleh.
EDITED TO ADD: oh, just saw your other posts - that's not a pit bull? I'm clearly a cat person. :oops: :oops:
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It's totally true that it's not your responsibility to make a white woman feel safe to walk past you. At the same time, it's not my responsibility to ignore my own self-preservation instincts to make other people feel better.
Ok, so are you suggesting that you walk across the street in Park Slope when you see joe white dude or a group of white teenagers walking towards you? Somehow I doubt that. To clarify, it's not any Black man's duty to make white women feel safe on the street by neutering themselves or making themselves appear to be safe in some way. I don't think white men need to address this concept in their day-to-day lives. -
liftandcut wrote:
no, of course it's not your responsibility to do that.It's totally true that it's not your responsibility to make a white woman feel safe to walk past you. At the same time, it's not my responsibility to ignore my own self-preservation instincts to make other people feel better.
Ok, so are you suggesting that you walk across the street in Park Slope when you see joe white dude or a group of white teenagers walking towards you? Somehow I doubt that. To clarify, it's not any Black man's duty to make white women feel safe on the street by neutering themselves or making themselves appear to be safe in some way. I don't think white men need to address this concept in their day-to-day lives.
but while i can't speak for A666, i have also felt the way she is describing: to whit, on some of those rare occasions when i have crossed the street to avoid men or teenage boys, i have noticed the people i am avoiding watching me do so. and even if they were all grade-a fantastic people, i'm not going to apologize for erring on the side of caution when i'm worried about my own safety.
as i said, i certainly have crossed the street to avoid white males -- in fact, the group i'm most likely to fear is white teenage boys. (although i cross the street for reasons of perceived safety VERY rarely, so it's not like i'm zig-zagging home every night, no matter what neighborhood i'm in.) possibly white men don't think about this, but that may have more to do with how the media tells them white women feel about them, rather than the way many of us do feel.
also, not that you asked, but speaking of gender/race relations on the street around here, i think black women get way more shit on the street from black men than white women do. this is only based on my own observation. but if i were to name the group with the most reason to cross the street to avoid a black man, i'd totally go with black women. -
At night on dark or quiet streets or late at night, I will cross the street or walk in the middle of the street, or turn around and walk to a doorman-occupied building to avoid any man or teen, especially if wearing a hoodie up covering his face. Men in suits, friendly looking men, white hipsters, no one is exempt here. Any one of them can grab me and pull me into a car or into a vestibule so I'm going to be careful when walking alone. Take a good look at Ted Bundy. Looked like a really nice guy.
Every 2.5 minutes a woman is raped in America. 1 in 6 American women are victims of sexual assault.
You're right, it's not your responsibility to make women feel safe on the street and it's not a woman's responsibility to make sure your feelings aren't hurt if we cross the street.
ETA: If sexual assault/rape against women is almost entirely perpetrated by men, then whose responsibility is it to make women feel safe in our neighborhoods? Women are still being told that we're asking for it if we wear revealing clothes, walk home alone late, or heck, if we're just living our lives we're "asking for it" or provoked it somehow. So, whose responsibility is it that 50% of the population lives with this kind of fear? -
You're right, it's not your responsibility to make women feel safe on the street and it's not a woman's responsibility to make sure your feelings aren't hurt if we cross the street.
Interesting way of putting it. This has nothiing to do with hurt feelings. It's about what I perceive as a lot of white women around here being more likely to cross the street or grab their purses when a Black man is walking toward them. As a person of color who has had to deal with this behavior in the past, it's still disturbing to me no matter how many times it has happened. I've seen the same women who have, on more than one occasion, jet when they see me coming, not even blink an eye when white men approach them. I've made a point of noticing these things because it is affects me. To trivialize my reaction to this behavior by boiling it down to hurt feelings is unfortunate, but not particularly unexpected. -
liftandcut wrote:
I suppose I should have clarified in my original statement about the rare circumstances under which I will cross the street to avoid somebody: If it's late at night and there's nobody else around, HELL YES I would cross the street to avoid a guy or a group of teenagers. No matter what race they are, no matter what neighborhood I'm in.It's totally true that it's not your responsibility to make a white woman feel safe to walk past you. At the same time, it's not my responsibility to ignore my own self-preservation instincts to make other people feel better.
Ok, so are you suggesting that you walk across the street in Park Slope when you see joe white dude or a group of white teenagers walking towards you? Somehow I doubt that. -
well, rest assured that women aren't exactly sitting at the top of the totem pole, and that even if, as you suggested in your first post, every man of color leaves the neighborhood, most of us will never feel we are able to "strut around carefree".
i don't mean to trivialize your experience or to say it didn't happen, but please understand that there are reasons for women to be careful around men of any color. (of course, since most rape isn't stranger-rape, we should really be more afraid of the men we already know -- there's a cheery thought!) -
liftandcut wrote:
I do apologize for trivializing the situation. Ironically, though, I was responding in a smartalecky way because I felt you were trivializing women's need to protect themselves at times.You're right, it's not your responsibility to make women feel safe on the street and it's not a woman's responsibility to make sure your feelings aren't hurt if we cross the street.
Interesting way of putting it. This has nothiing to do with hurt feelings. It's about what I perceive as a lot of white women around here being more likely to cross the street or grab their purses when a Black man is walking toward them. As a person of color who has had to deal with this behavior in the past, it's still disturbing to me no matter how many times it has happened. I've seen the same women who have, on more than one occasion, jet when they see me coming, not even blink an eye when white men approach them. I've made a point of noticing these things because it is affects me. To trivialize my reaction to this behavior by boiling it down to hurt feelings is unfortunate, but not particularly unexpected. -
If it's late at night and there's nobody else around, HELL YES I would cross the street to avoid a guy or a group of teenagers.
Obviously. I'm talking daylight, middle of the day, morning, early evening. That's why it's so irritating, and noticeable. I should have made that clear in my original post. -
liftandcut wrote:
do you do the blink-blink-spaz thing your current avatar does? 'cuz that could be the whole problem, right there.If it's late at night and there's nobody else around, HELL YES I would cross the street to avoid a guy or a group of teenagers.
Obviously. I'm talking daylight, middle of the day, morning, early evening. That's why it's so irritating, and noticeable. I should have made that clear in my original post.
(related: your avatar is cracking me up today.) -
apollonia666 wrote: [quote=liftandcut]
I suppose I should have clarified in my original statement about the rare circumstances under which I will cross the street to avoid somebody: If it's late at night and there's nobody else around, HELL YES I would cross the street to avoid a guy or a group of teenagers. No matter what race they are, no matter what neighborhood I'm in.It's totally true that it's not your responsibility to make a white woman feel safe to walk past you. At the same time, it's not my responsibility to ignore my own self-preservation instincts to make other people feel better.
Ok, so are you suggesting that you walk across the street in Park Slope when you see joe white dude or a group of white teenagers walking towards you? Somehow I doubt that.
Thank you for clarifying this. Because in other threads, victims of crimes have been ridiculed for "asking for it" by doing any number of things...sometimes they are ridiculed for not crossing the street when "everyone knows you should cross the street late at night" or something to that effect.
I guess what I'm saying is that if you were to read all of the threads on these forums, you'd have some very conflicting answers regarding matters like these. -
do you do the blink-blink-spaz thing your current avatar does? 'cuz that could be the whole problem, right there.
As a matter of fact, I HAVE been doing that lately. All this time I thought it was my knuckle dragging and prognathic jaw. Hot damn! -
liftandcut wrote:
I take back my take back, get the hell over yourself with your insecurities and broad generalizations
Ok, so are you suggesting that you walk across the street in Park Slope when you see joe white dude or a group of white teenagers walking towards you? Somehow I doubt that. To clarify, it's not any Black man's duty to make white women feel safe on the street by neutering themselves or making themselves appear to be safe in some way. I don't think white men need to address this concept in their day-to-day lives.
Every white woman doesn't cross the street when they see a black man just like every black man, or person for that matter, isn't all nicey nicey
You sound butthurt, why do you care so much where people walk? -
I also get plenty of the crossing-the-street thing when I'm walking my dog.
I often DO the crossing-the-street thing when I'm walking my dog. She tends to be nasty toward other dogs, so I sometimes cross the street when I see another dog walker approaching; other times, I cross just because my dog is in the mood to take a big whiff of every person we pass (which, of course, is scary or just annoying to some people). Occasionally, some dude will give me the stink-eye, and I know he's thinking I crossed the street to get away from him, but in truth, that's hardly ever the case.
(edited to fix screwed-up quote) -
"stink-eye" and "butthurt"
I need to use those terms more often!
and I agree with Cool the Kid last comment.
Get over it man. No one right here is running scared from you on the streets. -
Cool the Kid wrote: You sound butthurt
Butthurt? I've never heard that term before. You must be familiar with that feeling.
Aren't you Black? Jeez, go watch "Eyes on the Prize." -
I was contemplating just this sort of thing as I was riding to school in downtown Brooklyn the other day and passed a common sight: a paddy wagon full of arrestees that were all black. It made me shake my head over how the crime situation has changed considerably over the past decade and a half or so.
As I've mentioned before, nowadays when you hear about a crime being committed in Brooklyn, it's safe to say that the perpetrator was black, or possibly Puerto Rican. This was FAR from the case a relatively short time ago, but with the income disparity here now, it's the norm. I can think of almost a half-dozen native Slope white kids I grew up with who went to Rikers or beyond. Imagine that now!! :shock:
The way the races perceive each other has changed as well. For example, a couple of my childhood friends were standing outside of Smiley's Pizza on 9th and 7th not too long ago, as a bunch of Puerto Rican teenage types, probably from Sunset, stood by the subway steps heckling everyone that went past.
When one of them asked my friend for a cigarette (friend is now in his late 20's and could probably pass for a yuppie) and was turned down, he responded by yelling out "YO PEOPLE THINK JUST CUZ THEY WHITE THEY CAN'T GET FUCKED UP!" OF course when my friends told the whole teenage crew, in an actual Brooklyn accent, to take a walk up the block to handle the disagreement, the kids were shocked and immediately sang a different tune. :-'
As another friend laments, "There's no such thing as tough white people around here anymore". You can mark that up as one of the reasons why caucasians are now viewed as easy targets in Park Slope and Prospect Heights.
:eye: -
Mamacita wrote: "stink-eye" and "butthurt"
But not in the same sentence, when possible. It is dangerous to overload the stink-eye with too much butthurt, ya know.
I need to use those terms more often!and I agree with Cool the Kid last comment.
I'm running scared from him on the streets. But that is mostly from the googly eyes and Gene Simmons tongue more than anything.
Get over it man. No one right here is running scared from you on the streets.
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